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I’m a semi-successful adult with a decent job. Why do financial conversations still make me feel clueless?

March 24, 2026
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I’m a semi-successful adult with a decent job. Why do financial conversations still make me feel clueless?
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When I was accused of being “financially illiterate” by a random guy in a bar during a conversation about investing last year, it knocked the wind out of me. After I completely flubbed my words in an attempt to stay afloat, I realized that a new form of anxiety had crept into my subconscious: I, a 36-year-old, grown-ass woman, know nothing about money.

I’m not sure how I ended up here. I’m incredibly type A — I pushed myself academically and athletically in school, and I continue throwing everything into my career. I support myself in full (I suppose because I’ve gotten lucky with jobs). But I couldn’t tell you my five- or 10-year investment strategy, let alone my plans for retirement. Truthfully, that lack of knowledge doesn’t just make me ashamed. It’s terrifying.

Paco de Leon, founder of the Hell Yeah Group and Hell Yeah Taxes, tells Vox that anxieties like mine are super common. “I’ve met plenty of folks from all different ages who are both confused by money and I’ve met plenty of folks who are actively trying to educate themselves on the topic,” she said by email, adding that the financial industry isn’t a “particularly welcoming environment.”

But, de Leon stresses, “confusion doesn’t have to be permanent. I’ve seen lots of folks go from confusion to turning their financial lives around. You don’t need to understand the entire financial system to start making progress.”

Here’s why it’s never too late to get your financial shit together — and how to take some impactful baby steps to get more comfortable.

A 2023 Pew Research Center survey found that roughly half of US adults felt like they knew a good deal or a fair amount about personal finances, 33 percent knew “some” stuff, and 13 percent didn’t know much or nothing at all. Another 2025 Pew survey found that the majority of Americans feel like they’re in either fair or poor shape with their finances — so money know-how clearly isn’t clicking in a universal way.

Some of this is likely driven by a cultural reticence to talk openly about finances, coupled with the pervasive belief that anyone who is struggling to make ends meet only has themself to blame. Katie Dow, a certified financial adviser based in Bozeman, Montana, tells Vox that even within families, people don’t always discuss finances openly. “We talk about sex, drugs, and rock and roll more than we talk about money,” she says. “A lot of families don’t take the time to be like, Well, Mama makes this, and Daddy makes this, and this is how we budget.”

“Our school systems do a lot in theory, but in actual budgeting and tactical resources for daily life, we’ve missed that boat,” Dow adds. “We don’t do a lot of, This is a checking account; this is a savings account — very basic financial literacy topics that can improve what we do every day.”

Regardless of what led to your lack of financial literacy, it’s crucial to cut your former self some slack, Aja Evans, a New York City-based financial therapist, tells Vox. “You have to forgive the version of you who made the mistake and just say, I didn’t know. I cannot chastise myself about something I just didn’t know.”

Block 20 minutes of each day to do literally anything

If you try to tackle every money problem all at once, you’re going to feel overwhelmed fast. “The easiest first step you can take right now is to set aside 20 minutes every week for weekly finance time and start showing up,” de Leon says. “Don’t worry about what you’ll do during this time. Just block it off and take it seriously.”

For example, de Leon suggests, perhaps you just assemble all of your financial logins in the first week of check-ins. Then, in your second week, you assess your student loans. “Maybe the third week, you call your cellphone provider to ask them why they keep raising your monthly fee,” she says. “Allow yourself the space, and you’ll be surprised to see how this area of your life expands.”

Another way to spend your 20-minute productive period? Pick up a book or cue up a podcast — just getting more money talk, no matter how small, into your daily routine can help. Evans is a fan of the book that de Leon authored, Finance for the People: Getting a Grip on Your Finances. De Leon personally likes How to Be a Rich Old Lady by Amanda Holden and Rich Girl Nation: Taking Charge of Our Financial Futures by Katie Gatti Tassin. Dow listens to Afford Anything and NerdWallet’s Smart Money Podcast for tips.

Bring financial topics into everyday conversations

According to Dow, discussing money more is an important first step toward true empowerment. “Whether it’s a financial adviser, a partner at home, whether it’s a parent, just being able to openly talk about money, just get practice talking about money…will help reduce the amount of anxiety when those questions come up in the future,” she says.

Dow adds that these conversations can highlight learning opportunities (say, your friend recently got an accountant and can lend you that knowledge) or just give you space to vent. And while the cost of hiring a pro might feel counterintuitive to your goals, Dow compares the extra fee to a personal trainer if you’re trying to boost your health: You can do the work yourself, but it helps to have someone mentor you. “Investing in your own coach, [be it] a financial coach or financial adviser, can be really, really helpful in that money journey,” Dow says.

Stephanie Watson, a financial adviser at Northwestern Mutual in New York City, tells Vox that most financial advisors (including her and her colleagues) offer complimentary introductory sessions — you really only start paying once you become a regular client. So, at a baseline, enlisting the help of a financial pro can help direct the conversation about your goals.

Map out your income, where it’s going every month, and the places you want it to go

Use a couple of your 20-minute check-ins to really take inventory of your current financial situation. “How much is coming in? How much is going out? That’s really going to be the bedrock of any foundational plan,” Watson says. She recommends using a budgeting app (her go-to is Rocket Money) to make the process a little less cumbersome.

Next, figure out how much you need to cover…everything, de Leon says. “Living expenses, bills, debt payments, fun stuff, savings, and goals — if you aren’t earning enough to support that, then start moving levers,” she says.

A “lever” could mean increasing your income (easier said than done, obviously) or reducing overhead like your rent or car payments (also difficult), but there are some low-lift ways to move money around, too. For example, Watson often suggests her clients look into a high-yield savings account. These tend to have much higher interest rates than traditional savings accounts, so your cash grows faster while it’s just sitting there. “That’s one really easy way that you can make more money,” Watson says.

Speaking of savings: “Make it a nonnegotiable habit to save/invest a portion of every dollar you earn,” de Leon says. “Think about it [in] terms of percentages. Start where you can. Maybe that’s only 5 percent, but you want to grow that to 10 percent, then 20 percent, then 30 percent.” The first thing you should save for is an emergency fund, which is three to six months of your expenses. Once that’s in place, de Leon says to start funneling money into retirement.

Watson is also a fan of setting up a high-yield savings account, if only because you won’t be as tempted to touch it. “If it’s a savings [account] attached to your checking, it might feel kind of like free money,” she says. “So if you put it somewhere else, it’s going to trick your brain into leaving it alone.” (Here’s a more comprehensive rundown on how to plan for retirement.)

FYI: You don’t have to familiarize yourself with every economic term in the book, but de Leon says it’s worth understanding one thing: how compounding interest works. Here’s a quick overview: When you deposit money into a retirement account, that amount (called your principal) will grow (thanks to interest, which is the money the bank pays each month you for storing your money with them). Interest is calculated as a percentage of your principal. So as time goes on, you earn interest not just on the money you’ve deposited, but also on the money the bank is paying you. So the longer your money stays there, the more money you’ll earn, depending on the interest rate.

“Compounding is the single-most powerful concept in all of finance,” she says. “When it’s working for you, in a retirement account or an index fund, it’s magic. But when it’s working against you, like on a credit card balance that you’re only making minimum payments on, it’s devastating.”

Whatever you do, don’t put off financial education because you think it’s too late for you

When I had that awkward conversation with the guy in the bar last year, I felt inadequate, largely because money feels like something people in their thirties should have a firm grip on. It frightens me that I might not have a solid plan for retirement, or even enough saved for a catastrophic emergency. The fear can make it hard to do anything.

So when both Watson and Dow said that several of their clients start having money conversations for the first time in their 30s, 40s, 50s, and beyond, I felt a lot of relief. “When is the best time to plant a tree? Yesterday. When is the next-best time to plant a tree? Today,” Dow says. “That is the exact same thing when it comes to money. … It’s never too late, but let’s get started today.”

Again, none of this needs to feel cumbersome right out of the gate: Simply take a little time every week to educate yourself and assess your money and your goals. And now that you’ve read through this article, I promise, you’re nowhere near as ‘financially illiterate’ as you (or some random drunk stranger at a bar) might believe.



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